Carrasco Psychological Health Services

It is great to care for others. I know this may vary based on values and culture but being there for others is not necessarily a bad thing. Relationships can bring us joy and sometimes just helping others can improve our mood. Thus, I want to emphasize that it is kind of you to be there for others. As you may have guessed, it is important to set limits and take time for yourself. Keep in mind the idea that you “cannot give from an empty cup.” There is only so such you can do for others and not yourself. If you neglect your own needs and forget to nurture yourself you can begin to experience a sense of burn-out or resentment when helping others.  It will be especially important to care of yourself regularly if you are caring for others on regular basis such as family and friends. Ultimately, you will not be too helpful eventually to others if you are experiencing an overwhelming amount of stress yourself.

Self-care is often emphasized by health professionals and look a variety of ways for the individual. For example, you are doing something by at least caring for your basic needs as you said. I recommend to stick to a routine as much as possible of doing things to care for yourself. It can be doing exercise on  a regular basis, eating a good meal, meditation etc. The idea is that it is realistic to implement into your routine.

One question to ask is what is that you could be avoiding in this situation. You are having difficulty in completing the tasks from work and school which is likely only causing more stress by not doing these tasks. There could be something you are afraid will happen by attempting these things. A more specific question to ask yourself is what is the worst thing you think will happen? And how likely is it that this will come true? Sometimes the thing we fear does not seem as realistic once we begin to verbalize that fear. This is why we use therapy to verbalize these thoughts we have going on in our mind and evaluate them further. I am willing to predict that you are more likely to experience continued stress from avoiding to do tasks rather than your worst possible fear coming true.

Now, what do about it? The fear you are describing may be described as anxiety. The way I like to target anxiety is by facing the feared situations head on. It seems like the most effective way to overcome anxiety is by being exposed more often to what we are scared of until we then realize that there is nothing to fear. The idea with work and school tasks is to just start setting up small goals for yourself to complete. This does not necessarily mean you will complete everything immediately. It may  not be a realistic goal for us right away. However, you can set up the goal of just completing one piece of a larger project. It is important to note this as making progress and facing that anxiety about doing these tasks. Each time you increase the amount of time you are doing the tasks. And you do this even if you are anxious. You might wonder if it is possible to just do all these things without experiencing anxiety at all. Well yes it is possible. However, it is not possible to never be anxious again. The idea is that you try to do these tasks even if you are not 100% ok. By doing this process you begin to notice that uncomfortable emotions will come and go more quickly as you continue to stick to your routine and attempt to complete tasks.